Revelations

Today has been a day filled with revelations.

.

This morning I decided to start decorating the house for Christmas. I already had the tree up, but that’s it. The tree is only two feet tall, so its not like that is a great accomplishment or anything. There were no decorations outside, so I made a trip to the store to pick up some lights. I did the one armed stroller shuffle with Collin through the packed aisles of the Christmas Tree Shop in Dennis, toting a red basket full of candles, lights, wrapping paper, and other Christmas goodies. I even found some little plastic thingies to attach the lights to the gutter, no akward stapling required.

Upon return to the house I sat Collin out on the front porch in his chair to watch me work. I tested all of the old strands of lights, and somehow, miraculously, they all worked. I drug out a couple of extension cords and I was really excited to see that the outside outlet was right next to the corner of the house where I wanted to start hanging the lights.

How could everything possibly be going so well?

First, I planned to run a row of lights along the rain gutter in the front of the house, then, I would see what was left over and maybe do the porch rails. I tore opened the packaging to the plastic light hanger thingies to see how the heck they worked, since I’d never used them before.

No instructions. “Huh, whatever–I’ll just shove one on and see if it works.”

I grabbed a plastic gutter light hanger thingy and walked over to the corner of the house where I wanted to begin… I reached up…

then I looked up. Way up.

It was at this moment that I experienced my first revelation:

We don’t own a ladder.

I drug out a patio chair, hoping for the best. For a moment I considered stacking one on top of the other, but, fortunately, decided against it. I gave up and put the lights in the bushes in front of the house instead. 

christmas lights

I’ll let Nick hang the lights on the gutter. It’s a guy thing anyway.

Later on in the afternoon I loaded Collin up for our walk. It was a really nice day. Near the police station, on the corner, there is a big holly bush. I was thinking how pretty it was, as we passed by. Then, I was thinking it would be fun to make a wreath with the holly leaves. I was considering coming down in the middle of the night to steal the holly for a wreath, when I remembered it was right next to the police station. Then I was thinking that it might be even more fun BECAUSE it is right next to the police station.

Holly Berry

Anyway, as we were walking by it I spoke the words “Holly Berry” out loud to Collin, since I tend to narrate everything I see to him.

I laughed out loud. This was my second revelation.

Holly Berry, the plant, sounds just like Halle Berry, the actress. It’s like the names Lily Pond or Sandy Dunes.

Is there a word for that?

Halle Berry

Heh, why am I always the last person to notice these things? It took me 23 years to figure out that every kiss really does begin with “K.”

Just when you think you know everything…